(Story) Guilt

This is the day I get promoted. Today is also my birthday. Where am I right now? Sitting at home alone. It's been eight years since I talked to any of my friends. This is just a small price I pay for what I've done. I was more of a selfish man.

Eight years ago, my best friend was a girl. She was the prettiest and everyone admired her. We were in grade 12. We've always had the same class and had a plan to take the same course in college. Before school starts, we study together in our locker. After school, we go to my house or hers. We would play PS2 or tell funny stories. Her dad buys a lot of DVDs so we spent a lot of time watching movies.

There has been many scholarships given to us until we can finally afford the course we wanted. For graduation, we were gonna have our first drinking party with our friends. I had it all planned. I could have lived happily with my best friend. Everything changed since the fire at a small coffee shop.

The coffee shop was being robbed by a man. I thought I did my job as a man to protect everyone. I choked the robber and I didn't know he had a hidden knife. I got stabbed and he took my best friend as a hostage. He escaped to a small house where he was followed by cops. Out of desperation, he burned down the house with my best friend inside. He thought the cops would save the girl and buy him time to escape. He was right except that he thought he would get away. My best friend was also saved.

When I woke up in the hospital, my other friend was there. I was hoping to see my best friend but she wasn't. They told me the story of what happened to her and there on, I was changed. Half of my best friend's face was burnt and never looked the same again.

After our recovery, I went to school just to find out everything is changed. I was too used with having her so pretty but I could not stand to see her face burnt. What if I just let the robber rob the coffee shop? What if I should have just took my best friend away? I just don't have the courage to talk to my best friend anymore.

My best friend felt that I'm avoiding her because she's not the pretty girl anymore as she used to. She was hurt and I'm losing her. The longer I don't talk to her only makes our distance greater. I tried every time to talk to her but I couldn't. I was a slave of my own weakness.

After four months, it's graduation time. I took every courage and guts I have to talk to her. I wanted to put things back again but I was too late. At that time, she already hate me and never want me in her life again.

I left and since then, I made sure I'm never heard of again. I saved up enough money for her surgery. Today, I sent her the money and a letter of what it's for. I've already arranged the best doctors I can find. If she takes the offer, her beauty is all I can take back. I can't offer her to feel good about the past but I promised that I will disappear forever if that is all it takes for the both of us to move on. Regardless if she takes my offer or not, I'll take this burden alone.